The Cost of Expectation

At first, every act of love feels pure. We give without counting. A smile, a helping hand, a word of encouragement—it flows naturally, without thought of return.

But slowly, expectation creeps in. It’s quiet at first, almost invisible. You give someone time and expect their attention in return. You lend a hand and expect gratitude. You open your heart and expect it to be held with the same care.

Expectation changes the nature of love. What was once a gift becomes a transaction. And transactions are always measured—did I give more, did I get less?

I’ve lived through this trap many times. In friendships, in family ties, even in my work, I found myself waiting for acknowledgment, for balance, for “fairness.” When it didn’t come, disappointment settled in like a shadow.

The truth is, expectation has a cost. It robs joy before joy even arrives. When we attach conditions to love, we stop experiencing its freedom.

That doesn’t mean life should be one-sided. Giving without expectation doesn’t mean becoming powerless. Life has its own rhythm of return—you may give in one direction and receive from another. The harvest comes, just not always from the field you sowed.

To give without keeping score is not weakness; it is strength. It’s choosing peace over calculation. It’s choosing freedom over bondage.

And when you let go of expectation, love transforms. It becomes lighter, truer, unshackled.

Tamil Touch (Proverb):
“தந்த கை மீண்டும் வாங்காது.”
The hand that truly gives never expects to take back.

Unconditional giving is the only love that remains pure. Everything else is negotiation.